During our meetings, some of my directors use defensive language and shift blame when they miss their weekly metrics. How do we address this communication gap during our sessions so they take real ownership of their numbers?

Question

Tyler Smith · Accepted Answer

When team members use defensive language, it is usually a sign that they feel threatened or do not fully own their seat. To break this habit, we must consciously shift our communication from passive actions to identity-driven ownership.

Instead of letting a director say they are working on a metric, we ask them to be the owner of that number. This subtle linguistic shift encourages them to align their professional identity with their results. When someone views themselves as a true leader rather than just someone performing tasks, their commitment levels change.

We also use the DiSC assessment to understand how different styles react to pressure. A high D style might become combative, while an S style might shut down. By understanding these tendencies, we can address missed targets objectively without triggering defensiveness.

In our sessions, we practice IDS® to get to the root cause of missed metrics. We stop focusing on excuses and start analyzing the system. This objective approach removes the personal blame, allowing your leadership team to focus on solving the structural issues rather than defending their performance.