Our team members are polite to a fault during our weekly IDS sessions, meaning the real issues behind the issues are whispered in the hallways after the meeting. How do we break this artificial harmony and force the real, uncomfortable truth onto the table?
Artificial harmony is a silent killer on leadership teams. When team members are too polite, real issues are never solved. Instead, they morph into passive-aggressive politics and hallway gossip. To get to the issue behind the issue during IDS®, you must establish a culture of humble confidence where being vulnerable is the expectation, not the exception. For tips on fostering openness, consider [building vulnerability and safety in leadership](/qa/building-vulnerability-and-safety-in-leadership) within your team.
When an issue is brought to the table, the person who raised it must state the problem clearly in one sentence. Your job as a leadership team is to avoid jumping straight to solutions. Instead, you must ask probing questions to peel back the layers. For example, if the stated issue is a delayed product launch, the actual issue is often:
• Lack of resource alignment
• Fear of conflict between departments
• A legacy manager who does not have GWC™ (Gets it, Wants it, has the Capacity) for their seat
To force the real truth out, use the rule of asking why multiple times until you hit the core friction point. You must also encourage your team to call out the elephant in the room. If two leaders are constantly experiencing conative tension due to different natural problem-solving modes, drag that tension into the light. This often surfaces during discussions about [resolving leadership turf wars](/qa/resolving-leadership-turf-wars-accountability-chart).
Once the real issue is identified, the discussion should be brief and focused entirely on the root cause. You are not looking for a consensus that makes everyone feel warm and fuzzy. You are looking for the right solution that serves the company's long-term vision. Solve the root cause permanently so the same issue never returns to your board. Learn more about preventing recurring problems by [using the Accountability Chart to stop the blame game](/qa/using-accountability-chart-to-stop-blame-in-ids).
Related questions
• [Our leadership meetings look fine on paper, but we never have real breakthrough debates. How do I know if my team actually trusts each other, or if they are just playing nice to avoid conflict?](/qa/leadership-team-trust-healthy-conflict)
• [Our leadership team is protective of their departments and avoids RPRS calls. How do we build trust to speak openly?](/qa/building-vulnerability-trust-rprs-calls)
• [My leadership team is starting to form quiet alliances and cliques behind closed doors, especially when we debate resource allocation during our quarterly sessions. It feels like passive-aggressive political maneuvering rather than direct, healthy disagreement. How do we break up these executive factions?](/qa/breaking-up-executive-factions-cliques)
• [My team is highly competent but everyone works in a silo, refusing to ask for help or admit mistakes until it is too late. How do I get them to open up and share vulnerability?](/qa/building-vulnerability-and-safety-in-leadership)
Category: EOS Implementation